• Kaveh Jalinous

Geostorm (2017): Film Review

Updated: Jul 23, 2020




A hefty budget? Check. One A-List Actor and a bunch of other nobodies? Check. A dumb plot that the studio believes in for no apparent reason? Check. A terrible movie? Check. The thought that occurred to me most as Geostorm went on: how did a movie like this get made? Honestly, how did the film company agree to finance 120 million dollars to a movie that was destined to fail? That is the most educated, and brightest thought, anyone can have while watching this hideous attempt at a disaster film. Warner Brothers has spent 270 million on making this and Blade Runner 2049 collectively, but at least Blade Runner was actually a worthwhile movie. This film has nothing that makes it stand out from every other stupid movie. Not even Gerard Butler can save this one from failing. He's actually part of the reason this film is so bad. ​ Firstly, the film tells the story of Jake Lawson, the man who single-handedly stopped natural disasters from ever occurring. By creating a system of satellites, the weather is now in control of the people, something that the world truly needs in the year of 2019. But, because of an unknown somebody tampering with the system, Jake has to go back to space to fix the problem and save the world. That's about 30% of the actual plot. The other 70% is divided between Jake's brother's Secret Service agent girlfriend, and Jake's brother's constant board meetings and drama. Welcome to Geostorm! Or, the 0 minutes where a 'Geostorm' is actually occurring. Exactly, the cool weather storms happened for 5 minutes, and the crazy weather storm that the trailers promised us didn't even occur at all. ​ And that is the biggest problem with Geostorm: the amount of unnecessary exposition. The film is constantly building the plot up, with no time to actually convey the plot. The film is easily forgettable, with a horrible set of performances anchored by the worst of them all: Gerard Butler. Usually, Butler sinks into his role perfectly, and is suited for these kind of movies, but for some reason: he can't act at all in Geostorm. Maybe it's because of how dumb the film, including its script, is, or maybe it's because he's tired and didn't think a movie like this is necessary, which he would be totally right. There was truly no point in making this movie, and it was destined to fail from the start. I'm just angry I wasted money and time on this film. A film like this deserves no money, instead, it should give us money because we had the patience to sit through it. Because, Geostorm is a prime example of a truly bad movie.

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